I need sleep


Today has been a rough one. Once again I was startled awake by my upstairs neighbor. So being awake was accompanied with the usual racing heart and the immediate surge of anger. I didn’t want to move out of bed though because it was super comfortable. Yet the more I lay there, the more aggravated I became. So the stomping continued and then there were louder thuds. Did she drop something? Is she jumping? What is going on up there?

But that louder sound was the final straw. I finally got out of bed prepared to confront her once again. This has got to stop!

My poor guinea pigs were begging for food and attention, but I had to ignore them. I had to brave the 35 degree morning air and confront the neighbor while I still had the guts to do it.

I knock. No answer. I know she’s in there! There’s no claiming to be gone. I knock again. Nothing.

I think I knocked for about 5 minutes. Maybe. No screaming or yelling, but louder knocks. I had to be sure she heard me, especially since I wasn’t getting a response.

Tired and convinced I wasn’t going to get anywhere, I finally left and went back to my unit. I grabbed a note card and began drafting a letter. I finished that and was going to tape it to her door, but I heard her locking up and heading down the stairs. So I met her in the stairwell and tried to hand her the note, “Please read.”

Nope. She wasn’t having it. I insisted and she called out “You’re bordering on harassment.”


Now, I can somewhat understand where that’s coming from. She assumes she’s doing nothing wrong and then hears some random person banging on her door. Yeah, I can see that. But this was only the second or third time (this has been going on for nearly a year!) that I’ve banged on her door. And since my one-sided door performances lacked yelling and cursing, I don’t see how that could be classified as harassment, but that really pissed me off.


I just want to get through a single night and have my alarm wake me up. I want to wake up without having a panic attack, without the anger. And I know I’m asking a lot, but I’d really like to wake up feeling refreshed. I know, I must be crazy or something. But these regular 5-6 hours of sleep a night are killing me.

So I waited for the front office to open before heading over there to file a complaint. And I just couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I expected to be given a clipboard so I could thoroughly describe what happened, give a full account. Nope. It’s a different kind of complex. These are individually owned condos and the front desk doesn’t handle any part of renting. They won’t even tell you if units are available for rent. You have to search on your own and find the owners. It’s ridiculous.

I was told: We have a new policy. You have to contact your unit owner or property manager and have them contact us about the complaint.

SERIOUSLY!?!? I can’t even file a complaint on my own behalf?

That didn’t help with the anger, either.

I contacted my property manager. And explaining my situation just made me feel even more idiotic. Like this is my fault. And it reinforced this struggle of wondering why certain sounds affect me more than others. Frustration at why I can’t just tune it out. Why do they stick with me more? Because I can guarantee that only a handful of people would likely think anything of the sounds that are bothering me so much. And it just feels like this is all in my heads and that I should just be able to deal.

But I can’t. Every effort I’ve made to tune out the noise has fallen short of what I need. The melatonin. The ear plugs. The eye mask with built-in speakers. Having music playing right near my ears. White noise fans. Nothing works!

I finally decided to cut my losses and sent an email to my supervisor (I work remotely) explaining the situation I’m having and asking about a change in my schedule. If I can start earlier and get off work earlier (getting to bed by 10 pm), then maybe I can voluntarily wake up at 6 am and it won’t be such a long day. Maybe I could get 8 hours of sleep that way. Waking up on my own would eliminate the panicked feeling, being jolted out of sleep. And I could hopefully cope better at work.

Lately, everything at work is more annoying than it should be. And being tired all the time is no fun at all.

Something has to change.

I seriously miss my sleep.


13 thoughts on “I need sleep”

    1. Thank you! I’ve gotten some good feedback from people who actually listened to what I shared today. That certainly helped with validating my side of the experience, but also confirming that I have made an effort. But man this is getting ridiculous.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Lindsay, is this a new neighbor? I know that you were having this problem before and I thought it had resolved because you hadn’t mentioned it in a while. Lack of sleep is more than an annoyance, it certainly beats can become a health issue. It’s sad that this is becoming an ongoing issue and there doesn’t seem to be any recourse for you. Can you think of any reason why it would have stopped and then resumed? In this world of crazy people, I worry about your safety.


    1. Thank you! I really appreciate that. It certainly helps to have a place to share and know I’m not completely crazy. … Man I really hope there are some solutions soon, too. There is reason for hope for a change in work schedule at least. So I’m hanging on to that for now.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. Oh dear, I hope your supervisor is amenable to your suggestion, I know how frustrating this can be especially when it seems there is nothing else you can do but to put up with it. I hate that I’m letting my neighbours controlling how I feel. That really really annoys me, having no control over my own emotions. I’m hoping your supervisor is flexible enough to say yes.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. All of that frustration and then the complex won’t even take your complaint?! Good grief.

    Is it a certain pitch of noise that offends you the most? Despite how bad my general hearing is, my hearing at the upper range is better than most people’s (think hearing dog whistle type noises), so those background noise always have me on edge since it drowns out the limited lower range noises I can hear. If so, maybe there is a type of noise machine that is designed to specifically drown out a certain pitch? (I know nothing about those noise machines, so that may be a dumb question haha) At any rate, I hope things improve soon.


    1. It’s hard to narrow down. Usually depends on circumstances and my tolerance level at the time for when sounds really bother me. But with the sleeping, I also think my body is on edge and waiting to hear them to alert me. It’s not a sound only dogs can hear but it’s definitely in the range where most people can ignore it. I’m also not sure why it’s really only in the past year or so that I’ve become more aware of sound problems. I got a sound machine as an early Christmas present. It’s helping some, I guess. Maybe takes time to adjust.

      Liked by 1 person

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